|beautiful baby boy!|
|I'lll never forget holding this tiny, precious hand...|
|Love, love this boy!|
|These are those big feet I told you about!|
“Children too are a gift from the LORD, the fruit of the womb, a reward.” – Psalm 127:3
November 1st was our next appt. with Dr. S ( the Peri). Like I said we were very anxious before this ultrasound because we knew Dr S. would be checking the function of all of the boys vital organs. We were a nervous wreck. As the ultrasound began the technician told us that she noticed more fluid on baby "A" than baby "B". We were told not to worry because it didn't seem to be posing a problem at this point. When she finished her part of the ultrasound, she handed it over to Dr. S. We got a good look at the boys hearts, lungs, kidney's etc. Everything seemed pretty much normal, or so we thought. Dr. S. all of the sudden had a look of concern on his face. We had seen this look one too many times and knew there was a problem. He said he hated to even say anything to us because I was such a worrier but he wasn't going to hide anything from us either. As Trent and I held hands, we were ready for the news. Dr S. told us that there was a small white spot on baby "B's" heart. He didn't have a name for the spot and had no clue what to even tell us it was. He said years ago, if this spot was seen on a babies heart that the Doctors would assume the baby had Down Syndrome. He didn't want us to worry though because he said there were many signs of Down Syndrome and he didn't notice any of the others at this point. Trent and I had already decided not to have an amnio because there is always a risk of miscarriage, when the sac is punctured. If we were to have this done it would for sure let us know if baby "B", Parker, would have any problems. It wasn't worth the risk to us. We could deal with Down Syndrome if we had to. It wouldn't change our love for our sweet boy. He was still ours and perfect in our eyes. We decided to try not to worry about this because things could always be worse. Dr. S. assured us that there was only a small chance that there would be any heart defects or Down Syndrome. With the boys being identical, the chance of one having a chromosomal problem without the other having the same problem would be rare but we didn't know what to think because our situation was becoming more and more rare daily. As our appt. was coming to an end Dr S. told us that from here until almost thirty weeks we would need to see him every other week due to a possibility of Twin-to-Twin Transfusion. When these words came out of his mouth I was almost sick. This just gave me something else to worry about. He said he did notice a slight difference in the fluid but we were not at a point where we should worry or even discuss options of treatment. We didn't know what to think.
Many people ask me did I ever question God or wonder why us, and the answer is, yes. I will tell you, that I never blamed God, but did constantly wonder how much more we could handle. We had done everything right. We both loved God unconditionally and prayed over these babies daily. I didn't drink caffeine. take over the counter meds, or anything else that would harm the boys. In my mind I had done everything possible. I did take Zofran for the constant vomiting but that was it. What else could I have done? I just wanted a healthy family.
Our next appt. was scheduled for two weeks away and I would see Dr G. again next week. Things really began to pick up at this point. As the day came for my next regular OB appointment, I had my soon to be sister in law Melissa and my mother in law with me. They wanted a chance to see the boys, and it worked out perfectly because Trent and I were in Alexandria for a work function for him. So, Melissa and Bren drove to meet us and stay the night and we left bright and early the next day to head to see Dr G. My appt. with Dr G. was great. She thought everything looked fine as far as she could tell. Although, she didn't have the capability to check the fluid levels of the boys because she didn't have high tech equipment like Dr. S. This made me feel a little better. I also asked her about the constant back pain, and she assured me that she thought it was normal. At this point I had gained 15 pounds in just a few weeks, so she thought this explained the problem. My back was just having trouble supporting three people. As we left this appt. I had no way of knowing what the next two weeks had in store for us. They would be the worst days of our lives, and we were so unprepared.